Recently there was a discussion about email addresses and women who share one with their spouses. It included the thought - I gave up my name when I got married...
Here's what I gave up - from MONA, winter 2008:
When I got married, I gave up being alone – alone for the holidays in a sea full of family and extended family, alone for the long three day weekends when my colleagues were hurrying home to their families, alone at night, but for the comfort of a trustworthy dog at my feet and a cozy cat nestled on the pillow beside me.
When I got married, I gave up having to do “it” alone – to clean the gutters with no one holding the ladder, to drop the car off at the shop and still get to my next destination on time, to stand by the side of my trustworthy dog when they put him down, to get back and forth to the hospital for surgery, to manage a household…
When I got married, I gave up being my only real, sincere and giving cheerleader – now I have someone who roots for me in the world, in the big and the small, who looks ahead with enthusiasm and optimism with me, and who relishes many of the same joyful memories that I have over a chilled glass of white wine.
I share a bed, a home, a car, two children, the chores, the ups and downs, the good, the bad and the ugly with my husband. I share dreams with him and sorrows, joys and consternation.
My marriage has been no sacrifice to me – it is what sustains me in a troubled, uncertain and chaotic world.
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